Monday, April 27, 2009

WE BEGIN WITH A CLASSIC

Ahhh, the Oreo cookie: a study in perfect juxtaposition. Bitter chocolate with sweet cream. Crusty exterior with soft, melty middle (like Gary Francione, or Shaq). Black with white: yes, much like Seinfeld's beloved Black and White Cookie, the Oreo is the junk food embodiment of racial harmony.

But this cookie is not satisfied with merely bringing the races together. She has a higher purpose still. She goes where too few cookies have gone before, breaching that illusory yet ever-present barrier between the species. For the Oreo cookie is - as you may expect from its presence on this blog - 100% vegan.

To be sure, Oreo comes to your mouth bearing a message of peace. Now don't fuck it up by dipping her in a cow's breast-milk.